[stacyflorida]

I recently reconnected with a man I knew in college. I knew that he had never had a girlfriend and we quickly became very close through email and talking on the phone. I live in Florida he lives in Seattle and I will be relocating within the next few months.
I went to visit him about a month ago and although we had a wonderful week and admitted that we were in love, it was quickly apparent that he had SEVERE performance anxiety and I know now that he is a virgin - we are both 43. This is now destroying what was the beginning of a wonderful relationship. One day he is extremely affectionate and is determined that together we will get the help he needs, the next day he withdraws completely and I feel deperate and depressed.
I just visited again and it was a disaster, left on a very bad note and I don't know what to do. He is like a caged animal when we talk about it and I don't know whether I should just abandon the whole situation. I keep reassuring him that together we can solve this problem, but he said something that really frightened me - he said that because it had not "worked" with me - which he expected to be perfect because he felt that he loved me, that his feelings towards me had changed. Does this sound familiar to anyone. I am deperate, devastated, confused - please help.

[Flavio]

ED is an extremely sensitive subject for us, men. Most of us would rather suffer in silence than seek professional help. Has your boyfriend considered seeing a doctor? My suggestion to you is this: try to make him see that ED is a highly treatable condition and the sooner he sees a doctor, the better. It won't be easy, though: you'll have to be persistent, patient and very diplomatic.